this is a short story that i was given at a horse camp a few years back. in case you didn't know, i am a christian, and quite proud of it. = ) please don't judge me for that, or send me rude mail telling me that i "suck". this is just wot i believe, and everyone is entitled to their opinion of life.
this was a beautiful wakeup call to me, and i hope maybe it could do the same for you.
hokaay.
The Room
In that place between wakefulness and dreams, I found myself in the room. There were no distinguishing features except for one wall covered with small index card files. They were like that ones in libraries that list titles by author or subject in alphabetical order. But these files, which stretched from floor to ceiling and seemingly endlessly in either direction, had very different headings. As I drew near the wall of files, the first to catch my attention was one that read ???Guys I have liked???. I opened it and began flipping through the cards. I quickly shut it, shocked to realize that I recognized the names written on each one. And then without being told, I knew exactly where I was.
This lifeless room with its small files was a crude catalog system for my life. Here were written the actions of my every movement, big and small, in a detail my memory couldn???t match.
A sense of wonder, coupled with horror, stirred within me as I began randomly opening files and exploring their content. Some brought joy and sweet memories; others a sense of shame and regret too intense that I would look over my shoulder to see if anyone was watching.
A file named ???Friends??? was next to the marked ???Friends I have betrayed???. The titles ranged from the mundane to the outright weird. ???Books I have read???, ???Lies I have told???, ???Comfort I have given???, ???Jokes I have laughed at???. Some were almost hilarious in their exactness: ???Things I???ve yelled at my sister???. Others I couldn???t laugh at: ???Things I have done in my anger???, ???Things I muttered under my breath at my parents???.
I never ceased to be surprised by the contents. Often there were many cards I expected. Sometimes fewer than I hoped. I was overwhelmed by the sheer volume of the life I had lived. Could it be possible that I had the time in my 20 years to write each of these thousands or even millions of cards? But each card confirmed the truth.
Each was written i
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