How to do the Time Warp

1. (It's just a) JUMP TO THE LEFT, with hands UP.

2. A STEP TO THE RIGHT (Time-Warper ANNETTE FUNICELLO suggests a very WIDE step.)

3.* (With your hands on your HIPS) YOU BRING YOUR KNEES IN TIGHT.

4. (Then) THE PELVIC THRUST (if repeated FIVE times, it nearly drives you insa-a-ane)

5. HIPSWIVEL (if not driven insa-a-ane by step four)

6. LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!


* Those with LIMB DISABILITIES may find it necessary to ALTER or DELETE this action, but NO EXCUSES for alterations to steps four and five.